recommended reading

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The Verbally Abusive Relationship:
How to Recognize it and How to Respond

by Patricia Evans

Discusses the potential damage of verbal abuse,
how to identify a problem relationship,
and how to change or leave such relationships

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The Emotionally Abusive Relationship:
How to Stop Being Abused and How to Stop Abusing

by Beverly Engel

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Emotional abuse is the least understood form of abuse. The number of people who are emotional abusers or who become involved with partners who abuse them emotionally is phenomenal. In this breakthrough book, Beverly Engel, one of the world’s leading experts on emotional abuse, shows us how to stop the cycle of abuse.

Engel’s work in the field has helped her gain a great deal of insight and empathy for both the victim and the abuser. The Emotionally Abusive Relationship shows emotionally abused people how to help themselves, as well as showing emotionally abusive people how to stop abusing.

Engel covers all aspects of emotional abuse, including the patterns that begin in childhood, teaching us how to identify and understand emotional abuse. This prescriptive book combines dramatic personal stories with action steps to heal.

Focusing on the dynamics of an emotionally abusive relationship, Engel provides strategies that will allow partners to work together to resolve their issues and stop the abuse. Her step–by–step programme provides the skills needed to:

  • Spot the warning signs that a partner is a potential abuser
  • Establish firmer boundaries and develop a stronger sense of self
  • Cope with the anger, stress, and insecurities that propel abuse
  • Confront the abuser when he or she becomes abusive
  • Stop blaming and start taking responsibility
  • Determine whether or not the relationship is worth saving
  • Prevent emotional abuse in the future

Engel also includes pertinent information on borderline personality disorder and its effects, as well as a section offering partners of individuals with Borderline Personality Disorder strategies for dealing with the types of emotional abuse they are likely to experience.

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